The Importance of Being In Community
Community can be defined in a myriad of ways. The simplest way to think of community, however, is really about connection. It’s not about a particular entity or group of people. It’s a feeling.
Community is feeling connected, accepted, supported, loved and respected.
Humans are social beings and community is critical to our ability to thrive and survive. It lets us know we have a purpose and we belong.
The fascinating thing about community is it’s important not only in the more personal aspects of your life. It’s also incredibly important in your business or career. A sense of community helps workers feel like they belong. A strong sense of community helps employees feel like they’re part of something, not merely a cog in the machine. They know and feel their value, feel seen and heard as human beings, and have a greater sense of purpose.
So, how do you build and nurture community for yourself or your workplace? Here are some thoughts on ways to build, develop and maintain your community for your highest self.
Show Others They Matter
If you’re an animal lover, you know the joy of being greeted at the door by a wagging tail or a sweet face looking to be picked up. That simple act creates community between yourself and the animal. The same is true with the humans in your life.
Now, you may not have a tail to wag, but showing the humans in your life - both at work, in community, and at home - that you are pleased to see them or spend time together, goes a long way towards deepening your bonds. You will never regret showing too much love and they will love receiving it.
Go Deeper
We often start and stop our conversations with small talk. “How are you?” “What’s new?” “What’s going on?”
Take the time to really find out what’s going on with the other person.
Try some of these on for size:
“What’s something exciting you’re working on?”
“What are you grateful for today?”
“How are you feeling about XYZ?”
This allows you to really BE with the person you’re talking with, instead of just passing time together.
Build Up Their Confidence
Building relationships are about both (or all) people involved. So, it’s important to give and be open to receiving. Compliments are a great entry point to make someone feel good, more confident, and at ease.
By helping build confidence in others, you are helping them tap into their most authentic selves, which is where deep and genuine bonding happens. It’s pretty magical, really. When you’re confidently you and you create space for the other to be confidently themselves, the relationship becomes incredibly easy and fulfilling.
Become a Connector
This is a really fun way to not only nurture your existing community, but also a great way to continue to develop and grow it.
Someone needs a new dog walker and you just happen to know someone who owns a dog walking business? Connect them!
A colleague mentions frustrations with renovating their home? Put them in touch with the contractor that redid your kitchen.
A mom friend of yours is struggling with a new diagnosis for their child. With their permission, put them in touch with the support group your cousin goes to.
Do this without any expectation of anything in return. Do it because it’s kind and helpful. The universe is always watching.
A Healthy Environment
Community can’t exist where there’s toxicity. If you have friends, family members, co-workers or employees who chronically complain, belittle or tend towards negativity, that will be a pervasive tenor throughout your community.
Think of the traits you value in healthy relationships (clear communication, empathy, boundaries, etc.). These are the traits you will want to keep close to you as you grow and develop your community.
Do a regular assessment of those individuals in your life or workplace. Is there someone who is bringing you or the rest of the team down? Then it’s time to have a candid conversation coming from a place of support. As an absolute last resort, it may be time to re-evaluate the relationship, potentially blessing and releasing them to allow space for someone more aligned with your values.
Humans crave connection. Feeling accepted for we truly are can give us validation and self-worth. Knowing there are people who support you and will be there for you when you’re struggling provides a sense of safety. Community provides all these qualities and more.
Where you find community is up to you; there is no one-size-fits-all. No matter if your community is big or small, live or virtual, finding people you connect with is vital your highest good - and theirs! Remember, we all need each other.
